Movie Rules

Horror movies:

• Splitting up is certain death.
  
• Hooking up with the hot chick before the killer is dealt with is certain death.
  
• Walking up to inspect a body lying on the ground is certain death.
  
• Thinking it's over is certain death.
  
• If you're a jerk, you're going to die a horrible death.
  
• If you're a jerk, but redeem yourself at some point, you'll die, but it won't be as painful.
  
• Only the nice guys and hot girls survive.
  
• If you see/hear something suspicious, don't investigate.  Really just a more general version of the "dead" body rule.
  

Action hero movies:

• If you haven't killed your nemesis yet, then the moment you're happy and think everything's going your way is the moment right before true tragedy strikes.
• Everything blows up.  Use that to your advantage.
• No matter how much you get shot at, the worst that'll happen is your leg will get shot.
• You'll never have to feel guilty for killing the hundreds of guards just doing their jobs.  Don't worry.
• Don't make friends with anyone because they'll either betray you or get killed right before your eyes.  (See the first rule of action hero movies)

Romantic comedy movies:

• If you're in a relationship at the beginning of the movie, expect it to fail very shortly.
• No matter how many embarassing situations arise that would make a girl in real life lose all interest in you, she'll still be interested in you.

Any movie with a computer:

• You never have to worry about learning Unix or DOS commands because every system has a convenient GUI to use when you've hacked into their system.
• Hacking is a simple process of hitting random keys very rapidly until you say "I'm in!"
• Viruses always have some visual effect to your computer like a silly animation mocking you or graphical corruptions on the screen.
• All computer programmers are geniuses can make any program for any purpose.  This one's actually true.