Friday, July 24, 2009


The following are pros and cons of growing a beard:
  • Pro - You get called boss and sir far more often when shopping for things
  • Con - You get asked "Are you buying these for your kids?" when buying cartoons or family movies (only really a con if you don't have kids or aren't buying said cartoons/movies for your kids)
  • Pro - You can save parts of meals for snacks for later
  • Con - Other people can see you saving parts of meals for snacks for later
  • Pro - Men respect you more (see Chuck Norris)
  • Con - Women are less likely to find you attractive
  • Pro - You're one step closer to becoming a wizard, mighty pirate, first mate of a starship, lumberjack, computer programmer, etc.
  • Pro - You can really emphasize how hard you are thinking at any given moment
  • Con - People will know when you're plotting evil schemes (no no I wasn't twirling my moustache!)
  • Pro or Con - People are highly unlikely to kiss your cheek
  • Pro - A good, thick beard successfully hides zits underneath it
  • Con - An improperly cared for beard may cause zits
  • Pro - At any moment (assuming the beard is long enough) you can shave off the beard and gain back 10 years of your life
  • Con (possibly) - You look 10 years older with a beard
  • Pro - You have an excuse to get a moustache comb
  • Con - You have to buy beard trimming equipment (unless you want the gross, unkempt beard look)
  • Pro - You get asked one less question when getting a haircut (ie "Do you want sideburns?")
  • Con - Wearing fake beards will no longer work as a disguise